A divorce coach is a mental health professional – often a psychologist, MA or an LCSW – who assists the clients to effectively move through the divorce.
The “divorce coach” is unique to collaborative law.
There is an emotional component of divorce that must be addressed, in addition to the legal component. In fact, the emotional divorce is often more complex than the legal divorce. In traditional litigation, emotions are legally irrelevant i.e., ignored. In a proper collaborative divorce, emotions are fully considered.
The divorce coach does not perform therapy. Rather, the relationship is a short-term intervention aimed at helping clients confront the emotional hurdles involved in divorce. Divorce coaching can involve working on a number of skills needed to navigate the process. A few of these skills include:
- effective listening;
- effective communicating;
- learning how to speak-up for oneself;
- identifying interests; and
- recognizing how your behavior impacts others.
A Divorce Coach will listen, then help you set goals and plan for the future.
A Divorce Coach will hold you accountable and keep you moving forward, even when it feels too difficult and you want to say ‘enough!’
VIDEO: NBC’s Today Show on Collaborative Divorce
(older, but still accurate)
Divorce Coaches can help clients address difficult topics too, such as substance abuse issues, infidelity, leaving or having been left and issues related to money.
Because Collaborative Law is client-centered, divorce coaching is client-centered as well. Clients can choose to have a divorce coach or not. One coach can work with both clients or each client can have a coach. Rarely only one client has a divorce coach and the other does not. It is important to realize that the entire family benefits, even if only one person is receiving coaching. It is beneficial for the whole family because the issues of one person often effect the entire family and the entire collaborative negotiation.